Hello! :B You've stepped into an Carol 's paradise land. Remember to tag and visit Carol's blog @ I want to be happy..! -A nice quote: Dont find love, let love find you. That's why it's called falling in love beacuse you don force yourself to fall, you just fall in itl-
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Name's CAre for short. Colours White, lavendar, Pink are my faves. Wants to slim down like last time as the picture above. And, i idolise 终极三国 and 下一站 幸福 show. Stay Cheerful Happy for all times.

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i am lost.
Written at Wednesday, January 29, 2014 | back to top

Yesterday i cant find him for the whole day. I feel so worried and uneasy . I keep guessing maybe is working too busy to answer my call or reply my msg. I waiting till 1pm , i tried to call him again but no answer .. maybe he work until 3pm and i tried to call but answer.. so i tried to call at 5pm no answer. Every two hours i tried to call he no answer... wow.. i don know how to describe my feeling. I keep looking at my hp. Hoping he will reply me or call me.. after my reunion dinner, my heart still feeling upset and i just don wan to stay at home n keep looking at my hp for his msg. I went sharon house although i know she n her hubby busy with spring cleaning but i really need to a new place to breathe. Till 12am is new year.. after awhile he msg me happy new year. And tell me he forget to bring hp out. After that i want to call him and talk to him.. his phone still no answer. Is it he is married or attached with gf? With his wife / gf cant answer my call? Is not i want to think too much. Is just the way he treat me let me feel it this way.
should i ask him?
Written at Thursday, January 23, 2014 | back to top

Yesterday my dear call me out of surprise. He ask if i am busy on 28Jan2013? I told i everyday very free one. He said i have a very good life.. i said i am very bored lo.. then he ask me if i can help him find secondhand iphone 4 as his friend want to buy. I told him i will try to help him search online. He ask me have i eaten all these, after that he say he going to call his fren about the phone and text me later. My heart was thinking : In his heart, his friend is more important than me ? Why he ask me if i am free on 28 Jan? Is it he got any surprise for me? Or bring me home to see his parent? Is it i think too much or expect too much?
I say yes to be his girlfriend....
Written at Tuesday, August 13, 2013 | back to top

I was drinking with my GM. I receive tony msg. He msg me telling me he reach home.He ask me what am i doing . I ask him why. Is it he miss me ? He replied abit. Out of my curious i ask him is it he like me . He say yes. Can i be his girlfriend? I replied why he like me. He say all girls say the same question. He say i am straight forward, can get along with him bleh bleh. And i ask him will he be faithful bf and nice to me forever? He replied yes. He ask me will i love him forever. I never think that much. And i just replied yes too. That's how we get together today. I finally gt boyfriend again. Hope he will be my only and last dear dear..
finally get to meet him
Written at Friday, August 9, 2013 | back to top

Tony is a guy i knew him through online chat and we have not meet each other since few months of knowing each other .. We finally meet up. I remember he come and pick me up for dinner. He is wearing a red tshirt and blue long jeans. I don feel exciting at all as i just treat him as hi bye friend. Or maybe a normal online to meet up. But from his side view , i feel he is quite nt bad looking to me. I meet him together with rainie at chinatown. I found rainie can get along with him, thinking to matchmake them together. We eat frog leg porridge and after that Tony send me n rainie home. I tot he sending me home and then rainie as my house is nearby so i choose to sit at the rear seat of his car. Rainie and him feel very weird. I don understand why they feel weird but when tony drive the car to the expressway, i realise he is sending rainie home first and then me. After he send rainie home, we had a walk at the seaside. I still remember i still got the urge of matchmaking him and rainie . I told him if he wan rainie number , they got time can meet up. But he said he don anyhow meet up with people who he don know well or don know long. He said he did meet up some online girls. But some wan those 'special ' service and he said meet them once and no more. I feel he is a good guy but still i feel he is a normal friend to me. Don have any wild thinking.
2months had passed...
Written at Monday, December 10, 2012 | back to top

This month is december. Time pass really very pass and BB had already broke up with me for two months. Now i really used to my single life. And i don feel upset anymore n i still friend with him. I feel that we are not meant to be and we really not suit for each other. It is time to move on. Right now I only want put all my attention to work. I want to do well in my career. Hope BB can find a job he really like.
A Zombie ME..
Written at Friday, October 5, 2012 | back to top

Just now BB initated break up as he blame me for causing him to lose job. He said he cant forgive me. And he say me and him cant cary on anymore. i was shock and the next 5 minutes i will struck with an empty mind like a zombie. Tears dropping. Heartbroken and I don know what should i do. And now i feel sad indeed but why nt that much as i had been through last time. I worry the next day i wake up i will feel very heartbroken.But i told myself i must be strong. Maybe he is just a monment of anger that why he said that. Give him some times to cool down. I am tired . I going to sleeping. Good night.
I promise i wont lie to you anymore!!!!
Written at Monday, May 21, 2012 | back to top

This is the first time i feel so heartbroken because me n my BB seem like over soon but i am blessed because my BB willing to give me one last chance. I will treasure this chance and I will not take it for granted. What really happens... The story begins.. 15 May 2012------- I lied to him i meet a girl for dinner and end up he discovered i lie to him. lying is my fault. all my fault.Because we both are too angry so we decided to break up. I was angry at the starting and trying to talk round myself to give up on the relationship. I know i don bear and i was sad. i know now i don feel heartache and tomorrow the pain will eventually act up . I was so scare when i wake up, i will feel the pain so i try to force myself not to sleep. But in the end the useless me fell asleep. But is just a sleeping waking zombie. I am sleeping but my mind is awaking. 16 May 2012-------- I wake up for work and in the bus as i listen to my music. My tears start to drop. This is expected. And i really don know how to heal my saddness and heartache. while typing my data, my tears keep dropping non stop but i still force myself to work.Heng i am a Temp staff, so no one talk to me and discovered that i am crying. After work, i cant see clearly, blur visions. I guess i had been crying too much plus looking at the computer with my watery eyes for the whole day. So i decided to go home and rest. Drink my white wine and get me to sleep. But end up i still wake in the middle of the night and start to cry again. Cry till i tired then i went back and sleep. I keep thinking, praying and hoping my BB will forgive me after he cool down.but i don dare hope much as he hate ppl lie to him.. And he say before even how much he love a person, even though he don bear to break, he will still let it go. 17 May 2012-------- i wake up with a upset stomach so i decide to take leave. Firstly is because i feel very tired and secondly i want to go down to the agency to sign my appointment lettter. Just then i remember tanjong pajar got bus 80 to my BB house . I agar agar he is working morning shift n i buy mask for him as i remember he want facial mask for very long time. I just want to dote him for one last time. I decide to went to his downstairs and wait for him. While waiting the feeling is very scare and sad. I scare he might not want to see me. Worry he will say nasty words to me which make me more heartbroke but is ok. i had mentally prepare for everything. I try to rush to reach there before 3 and heng i didnt see his bike. He might on his way. but i waited until 4.30pm but he still not home yet. Guess he might be working afternoon shift. i might guess wrong. Never mind. bring my disappointment home and i cry again . i cant remember i cried how long but i know is quite long . But two days later, he msg me and decided to give me another chance.. Thanks BB. I promise i wont lie to you anymore.